I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Cover your peen. We're going out.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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