Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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