3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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