i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
