so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
