that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
