I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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