Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
