So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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