dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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