Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
