This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
