And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
As shirtless as possible
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
