windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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