HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
