I want to make a zoo with you.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize