I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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