I hate all girls vehemently.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
