I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
