I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
is wine microwaveable?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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