I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
