All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Actions speak louder than pants.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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