Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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