would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
