We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
