So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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