I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Let's paint friendship bongs
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
