That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
