goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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