You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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