Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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