If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
