he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
