Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
