You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Randomize