My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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