You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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