Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
do herpes really smell.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize