hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
