Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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