She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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