she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
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