And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
