I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
