Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
