at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
it's like heaven, but drunker
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
