It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
