Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
