I'm really into asian looking animals
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize