Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
