after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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